一、英语短笑话，带翻译
’”mildly responded the witness．
“There are not，’”thundered counsel．“There is no need for you to argue the point！”
“But there are some questions which cannot be answered by‘yes’or‘no：“Have you ceased beating your wife？”
这个故事讲的是一个咄咄逼人的辩护律师，他惯于尽量去恐吓对方的证人。
有一个证人有点倾向于在回答问题之前做冗长的解释。
“我要你回答‘是’或者‘不是’，”辩护律师怒喝道：“那么请你回答这个问题Have You Ceased Beating Your Wife？你停止打你老婆了吗?
This story is told of a browbeating counsel，who habitually endeavored to terrorize his opponent‘s witnesses．
One witness rather tended to preface his replies with lengthy explanations．
“I want‘yes’or‘no，“answer this then。
“噢，”证人说： “你没有必要就这个问题进行争论。”
“可是有些问题无法用‘是’或者‘不是’来回答。”这位证人温和地回敬他。
“不存在这样的问题！”律师厉声打断他！” snapped the lawyer．
“Oh，” said the witness
二、英语笑话（要简短又笑的）
A teacher said to her class:
Who was the first man?
“George Washington, a little boy shouted promptly.
How do you make out that George Washington was the first man? asked the teacher, smiling indulgently.
Because, said the little boy, he was first in war, first in peace, and first in the hearts of his countrymen.
But at this point a larger boy held up his hand.
Well, said the teacher to him, who do you think was the first man?
I don't know what his name was, said the larger boy, but I know it wasn't George Washington, ma'am, because the history book says George Washington married a widow, so, of course, there must have been a man ahead of him.
有个老师问班上的学生：
“谁是第一个男人？”
“乔治·华盛顿，”一个小男孩当即叫道。
“你怎么知道乔治·华盛顿是第一个男人呢？”老师问道，宽容地微笑着。
小男孩说：“因为他是战时第一，和时第一，国人心中第一。”
这时一个大点儿的男孩举起手来。
“那么，”老师对他说，“你认为谁是第一个男人呢？”
“我不知道他的名字，”大点儿的男孩说，“但我知道不是乔治·华盛顿，老师。因为历史书上说，乔治·华盛顿取了一个寡妇，所以在他前面肯定还有一个男人。”
三、来几篇英文笑话(带翻译)，简单易懂哦
Teacher: Xiao Ming, you use 'really' is a word made a sentence.
Xiao Ming: The first draft of 'fruit', 'natural' and then soft drinks ...
Teacher: No, no, not the 'fruit' and 'natural' word apart!
Xiao Ming: Teacher Do not worry, I have not finished the entire sentence is - eat fruit,
Then soft drinks, really diarrhea.
天才儿童
老师：“小明，你用‘果然’这个词造个句子。”
小明：“先吃水‘果’，‘然’后再喝汽水……”
老师：“不对，不对，不能将‘果’与‘然’两个字分开！”
小明：“老师别急，我还没有说完，整个句子是——先吃水果，
然后再喝汽水，果然拉肚子。”
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